


i could've stayed up (all night)

by writingfiction



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Based off of PVRIS' album White Noise, Cemetery, Direct Communication, F/M, Gen, Ghosts, Graphic Description, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Haunting, I just really like ghosts ok, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Nonverbal Communication, Psychic Abilities, Psychic Bond, Wakes & Funerals, and The Sixth Sense
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-06-03 22:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6630055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingfiction/pseuds/writingfiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Josh was asked to speak, by Zack, and as he looks out at everyone who loved his best friend, and grits his teeth because it wasn't fair. This wasn't supposed to happen. Not now. Not ever. </p><p>Not to Tyler.<br/>-<br/>title taken loosely by "How To Save A Life" by The Fray</p>
            </blockquote>





	i could've stayed up (all night)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi so this was written at 11pm because I'm trying to not start up self harming again and so writing about shit instead of doing shit helps yanno  
> also ghosts r cool as hell  
> (chapter 1 edited april 29th)

Josh looked at the pressed black shirt that hung in his closet, and the pair of slacks that accompanied it.

His throat felt like it was going to close up. It was the exact thing he wore to Jenna and Tyler's wedding.

The suit jacket, it still had his groomsmen flower pin (he could never remember the name of it) pinned to the front.

It took him all of three seconds to fall back a few steps and fall onto his unmade bed, before _erupting in sobs._

 

* * *

 

Jenna didn't want to get out of bed. She didn't want to move. She didn't want to talk to anyone, or do anything. She wanted to hide in the guest bedroom of her mother's house and keep the blinds drawn.

"Jenna, sweetie, can I come in?" She made no attempt to stop her mother, as she walked in and sat down on the bed, caressing her youngest daughter's face.

"Honey, you have to get up today." Debbie said, ruefully, as Jenna stared ahead stoically. "I don't have to do anything," she mumbled, as Debbie sighed. "Jenna-"

"It's not like I can go get anything of mine. If I go back there, he-" This sent her over the edge. Her body shaking, from silent sobs, as she shoved her head face-first into a pillow.

"H-he's gonna-a be there, Mo-om. _T-tyler-r_."

"How about you wear something of mine? Or your sisters?" Debbie said, as she gently wiped her daughter's cheeks.

"He _told_ me he was okay. He _told_ me he loved me, and he's, he's falling, Mom. He fell and he's gone but he's never gonna leave. Never." Jenna mumbled, as she shook, breathing heavily. Debbie nodded, and squeezes Jenna's hand. Jenna just laid back down and cried quietly into the pillow.

_She has no idea how she's supposed to get out of bed ever again._

 

* * *

 

The remaining Josephs were standing in a small huddle, hands clasped together, as they each bowed their heads in silent prayer. They didn't know really what to pray for, but they all had one person in mind: _Tyler_.

After Chris mutters an " _Amen_ ," they break away, and those with significant others cling to them; Zack to Tatum, Madison to Will. Chris and Kelly lean on each other, not knowing what to do. They lost Tyler. They lost their oldest son, and there was nothing they could've done.

"D-did anyone get Jenna?" Jay asks suddenly, and Maddy looks up in realization, her face dropping.

"I'll...I'll go." She volunteers, her voice as reverent as it was during the prayer.

"Be safe, Mads." Will says, as she nods and tucks a blonde hair behind her ear, before running out of the church in her black flats.

_This doesn't feel right, and they all know it._

 

* * *

 

_It's 12:04, and Tyler's not in bed. Jenna slowly got up, not thinking anything other than her husband had suddenly gotten a genius song lyric or melody to string together at the obscure hour. That was normal._

_What was not normal was the bathroom light on, peeking out from underneath the white door. What was not normal was how the door was locked._

_"Ty?" Jenna asks softly, her voice wavering as she raps on the door lightly._

_"I'm fine, Jen. Washing my hands." He answered quickly._ _Almost too quick._

_"Ty, can you come out here please?" She asked, trying not to jump to the worst conclusions._

_"One sec, J." He said quietly, and Jenna heard the rattle of pills shaking out of the plastic container, and soon enough the door was clicked open, and Tyler was standing before her._

_"Had to go to the bathroom. Forgot to take my meds, too. Sorry," He mumbled, as she smiled in relief. "You're okay, baby. Come back to bed."_

_He does._

 

* * *

 

The service started fine. It was fine. Josh's hands were shaking but it was fine. Jenna was staring blankly ahead, but it was fine.

No one knew this man, but it was fine.

Josh got up to speak.

"In 2010, I met my best friend..."

 

* * *

 

" _Stupid, stupid, idiot. You can't do anything right. All those times you tried, when you were a sad sack of a college dropout, when you got those fucking tattoos, when you created some stupid-ass music to try and run from the monsters in your head; fucking stupid, Tyler."_

_Tyler stared directly ahead, looking himself in his eyes, as he grabbed the knife, and slashed his forearm quickly. There were already many stinging cuts dotted with crimson blood along both of his tan arms._

_This knife was meant for cutting fruit and vegetables; he'd seen Jenna use it too many times while she was cooking up some feast for the two of them._

_"How'd you even get this far? I thought you were gonna actually go through with it in 2009. Remember that time on the bridge? Or what about when you tried to off yourself in the bathtub? Half-assed attempt, couldn't even do it." Tyler chuckled to himself, as he dug the blade into his arm this time, and he winced._

_Oh. That one hurt._

_Deciding it was time to just stop, Tyler rinsed the blade of his blood, and walked to the kitchen, dropping it into the sink, and then going outside. He walked away from the apartment, and up to the top._

_It was all going to be over soon._

 

* * *

 

"I don't know why, or what happened that night. But, I know that Tyler wouldn't want to be remmebered for how he left, but for how he made a difference while he was here." Josh mumbled, glimpsing upwards at the congregation.

"Tyler had issues, sure. But he was...he was an amazing guy, and he did so much for everyone else."

In the silence, the scraping of Jenna's black heels scrap feverishly against the floor, and she was out of there.

Nobody saw Tyler die, they thought.

Except Jenna did.

 

* * *

 

" _Tyler! Tyler, get down!" Jenna screeched, as she followed him up._ _"No! You're not supposed to be here!" Tyler turned, yelling at her, his voice like venom._

_"Like hell I'm not! Get down, now." Jenna pleaded, as Tyler scoffed. She grabbed his hand, and recoiled._

_Blood?_

_"Oh, Ty..." Jenna said in realization, as Tyler looked down at her. "I'm sorry, alright? I'm sorry!" He sobbed, as Jenna grabbed his hand again, gingerly. "It's fine. C'mon, let's get you down." She pleaded once more_.

" _I need to do this, Jenna. I need to leave." He said, firmly._

" _What will it take to convince you to stay? I need you, Tyler. Josh needs you, your parents, your siblings, your fucking fans, we all do, Tyler." She was on the brink of hysterics._

_"I'll be gone in six months. It'll be fine. I'll be fine." He tried to be calm, to numb himself like he always had._

_He looked over the ledge, then back at her. Suddenly, he grabbed her and kissed her hard, before looking on with tear-filled eyes_.

" _Goodbye, my love."_

_With that, he took a step off and fell to the ground. She cried and cursed as she ran in the opposite direction. The next morning, they found his body._

_"There were no witnesses..."_

 

* * *

 

As soon as he finished, Josh went to find the heartbroken girl who knew too much.

"Jenna-" He started, as she turned to him, ice-blue eyes lined with tears. "What do you want, Josh?" She asked quietly.

"Why did you leave?"

"I can't take it. Seeing him, seeing this. It's too much. I loved him. He left, right in front of me. I couldn't make him stay."

Josh sat silently for a moment, then looked at Jenna.

"I think I know how to help you."

She scoffed, stuck in her anger, her sadness.

"Jenna...do you believe in ghosts?"

 

 


End file.
